Friday, July 25, 2025

Wondrous Memories of the Family Bed

 If you avoided reading in Thursday’s New York Times print edition all the “TrumpStein” stories, the Trumpian bombast stories and the assorted mayhem stories from around our country and world, you might have found the lead article in the international section that either warmed your heart or repulsed you

(https://www.nytimes.com/2025/07/22/world/asia/bed-sharing-parents-children-sleep-asia.html?smid=url-share).


Count me among the former. For, as a former participant in the family bed adventure chronicled in the article, I can personally vouch for the concept’s short and long term benefits. 


My involvement in the family bed experience began a little more than 46 years ago with the birth of our first child, Dan, who went by the name Danny back then. 


Danny suffered from severe colic. He was allergic to all dairy products. Rice, as well. Fortunately, mother’s milk sustained him. Gilda became a devotee of La Leche League, the breastfeeding experts. 


Danny started out in a crib in his own room. Each time he woke during the night—basically every two hours—I would toddle off to his room to bring him back to place his mouth at Gilda’s breast. At the conclusion of his meal back he went to his crib. 


We were getting pretty sleep deprived after a few weeks. When I wound up so disoriented that I positioned his tush rather than his lips at Gilda’s breast one middle of the night we agreed something had to be done. 


We placed a high rise bed in the space between our queen size bed and an exterior wall, effectively making a super king size bed. 


We had no fear of rolling over on him. He wasn’t crawling yet. The wall prevented him from dropping off the side of the bed. 


Weeks turned into months turned into years with Danny enjoying his proximity to us, not disturbing our slumber or romantic times, and he was not negatively affected by the television that occasionally played in the background at night. Indeed, when he was around two and able to enjoy Cheerios, on weekends we would often prop him up on his mattress, place a bowl of cereal before him and turn on Sesame Street, Mister Rogers and other PBS kinder-fare while we slept in for another hour or two. 


After Ellie was born when he was three, Danny resumed sleeping in his own room while she, who also had severe colic, enjoyed the comfort and security of the family bed experience. So much so that when it was her time to leave the haven of our bedroom for the next several years we would often find Ellie sleeping in Danny’s room, on his bed or, usually, on the floor. 



***No A.I. was used in the writing and editing of this post. The only intelligence employed was my own.*** 

Friday, July 18, 2025

"D" Stands for Everything Trump Is

Donald Trump has claimed to possess the best vocabulary, but his actions appear to be stuck on attributes that begin with the letter “D,” the opening consonant of his ancestral family name back in Bavaria, Germany—Drumpf.* 


Trump is a sucker for alliteration, as in his recently passed and signed “big, beautiful bill.” His political, economic and criminal life can be best described in words that begin with the letter “D,” so here are examples that depict his D.E.I.—his Demeanor,  Executive behavior, and Impact on America and the world:


TRUMP’S DEMEANOR

Defiant. Disastrous. Divisive.

Draconian. Dangerous. Dastardly.

Daffy. Daft. Dark.

Depraved. Debased. Deceitful.

Deplorable. Demanding. Dumb.

Despicable. Demonic. Demagogic.

Derogatory. Disrespectful. Despotic.

Devious. Diabolical. Dictatorial. 

Diffusive. Discursive. Destructive.


TRUMP’S EXECUTIVE BEHAVIOR PATTERNS

Deflect. Deny. Denigrate. 

Decry. Delay. Destroy. 

Denounce. Demean. Degrade. 

Discredit. Dissolve. Disrupt. 

Deplore. Defy. Deride.

Defame. Disparage. Discriminate. 

Delude. Deprive. Disdain. 

Dispute. Distort. Distract. 


TRUMP’S IMPACT

Discord. Distress. Division.

Damnation. Defection. Despair. 

Doubt. Drama. Dread.

Damage. Dishonesty. Disorder.


* According to Wikipedia, “Drumpf (alternately Drumpft), also spelled as Trumpf, is a German surname that dates back to the 16th century. It is most commonly known as the likely predecessor to the family name of Donald Trump” (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trump_family).

Sunday, July 6, 2025

Welcome to Third-World America

Welcome to third-world America, where:


The prospect of free and fair elections becomes more tenuous; 


The gap between the rich and the poor gets bigger; 


Tax rates of the rich go down, while benefits of the working class and poor, including health care, keep shrinking;


The ruling family’s business keeps growing with visible links to their political posts;


Pseudo science trumps fact-based science; 


Scientific knowledge is subsumed to the will of the executive; 


Vaccines to prevent deadly diseases are not promoted, they’re even critiqued as possible transmitters of illness;


Armed military troops patrol cities though no riots are occurring;


Police brutality, especially against minorities, rises;


Educational standards are lessened;


Environmental protections are watered down; pollution causing fossil fuel industries are encouraged with fewer emissions controls; renewable energy programs are discouraged; 


Free press laws are under assault; 


Executive action supersedes legislative action and cooperation;


Unqualified personnel are placed on judiciary and governmental panels;


Judicial rubber stamps validate questionably legal executive actions; 


Unswerving loyalty to the executive is considered more important than truth-telling; 


Military and sport spectacles are promulgated by the executive as balms for the masses;


“Separate and not equal” is acceptable government practice; 


LGBTQ rights are trampled. 

Thursday, July 3, 2025

Paper the Country with Billboards

Forget social media. Take a page from the award-winning film “Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri” and use good old-fashioned billboards along highways and rural byways to imprint the impact Trump’s Big Beautiful Bill will have on everyday Americans’ lives. 


Here are some examples of messages to awaken voters to the consequences of voting for Trump and his allies in Congress: 


Billboard

Are you or a family member a veteran?

Trump’s Big Beautiful Bill cuts food support for veterans.


Billboard

(After a local hospital closes down put up this billboard)

You can thank Donald Trump and Republicans in Congress for closing down your hospital by passing their Big Beautiful Bill that increased the national debt and gave tax breaks to the mega-rich. 


Billboard

School children are going hungry because Donald Trump and Republicans passed the Big Beautiful Bill that increased the national debt and gave tax breaks to the mega-rich. 


Billboard

The average millionaire was handed a tax break of more than $90,000 by Trump’s Big Beautiful Bill. Billionaires got more.

The average American family earning less than $50,000 received a tax break of less than $300. 

How beautiful was that? 


Billboard

Does anyone in your family or a friend suffer from cancer? 

Donald Trump has stripped billions of dollars of funding for cancer research.


Billboard

Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk, Peter Thiel, the Trumps, tech billionaires—they all got a tax break of hundreds of thousands of dollars from Donald Trump’s Big Beautiful Bill.  

How much will you get? 


Billboard

Are your kids hungry at school? 

You can thank Donald Trump and his party of lackeys for gutting SNAP programs in their Big Beautiful Bill.

16 million kids lose free school meals.


Billboard

How are you feeling today? 

How are your elderly relatives? 

Trump’s Big Beautiful Bill cut Medicaid funding by 12%. 

17 million Americans will lose healthcare coverage. 

Sunday, June 29, 2025

Newlyweds in Venice Provide Memories

Gilda and I were not invited to the three day wedding extravaganza in Venice ceremoniously linking Jeff Bezos with Lauren Sanchez. 


But we did attend a Venetian wedding 25 years ago that set a standard not easily matched by any nuptials we have since witnessed. 


With about 20 friends from America in attendance, and another 70 or so relatives and friends from Italy, Gianna and Jim exchanged marriage vows in the 15th century Gothic style Church of Santo Stefano. For Jim, a widower, it was his second marriage. 


A Catholic, Gianna had married and divorced her first two husbands. As both men were Jewish, rabbis had officiated the ceremonies. Now, marrying Jim, a fellow Catholic, finally a priest could sanctify her union as, in the church’s eyes, Gianna had never previously married, much less divorced. 


Ironically, the priest was a Jewish convert. Indeed, he had been a rabbi. I have teased Gianna that her three marriages were officiated by rabbis. 


Gianna was born in Venice. Her elderly mother was still living in the canal city. Her brother and his wife lived in nearby Vicenza where he was head of the Italian office of the Gemological Institute of America. 


A co-worker of Gilda’s at Beth Israel and later Mount Sinai Hospital, Gianna orchestrated a near week-long celebration including several group dinners. A visit to the GIA proved educational in precious metal security. 


Upon entering the GIA each visitor and their belongings were weighed. We were weighed upon exiting, as well. Any discrepancy had to be accounted for by the weight of purchases that might have been made. 


We next traveled to downtown Vicenza to Gianna’s brother’s upper floor residence in a stone building easily 400 years old. When we emerged from the elevator, centuries of time evaporated. The apartment was one of the most modern Gilda and I had ever been in. Gilda commented how environmentally conservative Italians and other European countries have been compared to Americans. They preserve the exterior character of their buildings, gutting the inside to retrofit modern conveniences. In America, all too often we knock down heritage structures to build bland, formulaic structures absent character. 


This preservation mentality displayed itself to us a few years later when our family vacationed in Eastern Europe. In Budapest we idled our car as  Gilda went inside the old, very old, Hotel Pest to check on its accommodations. She emerged after 20 minutes giggling in delight. Yes, the exterior was old, but the interior was ultra modern, though the architects did leave a glassed off view of how the building looked hundreds of years ago. 


Back to Venice: Following the late Saturday afternoon ceremony, the wedding entourage boarded gondolas for a circular half mile voyage to the Bauer Hotel for the dinner and party. It was the local custom back then that while the band played during dinner no one danced. Gianna’s and Jim’s American guests had other ideas.


Between courses, we Americans got up to dance. At first the band was nonplussed. But the band soon got into the swing of things and we danced the night away, joined by local Venetians. 


Like Bezos and Sanchez, Gianna and Jim had top line entertainment attend and perform at their wedding. A personal friend, Sean McDermott sang during dinner. McDermott has had lead roles in numerous Broadway musicals including Miss Saigon, Grease and Chicago, and has performed for three presidents at the Kennedy Center in Washington, D.C.  



Murrays in Venice: Gianna’s and Jim’s wedding was not Gilda’s and my only time in Venice. On our first trip there during July 1976, we had a memorable encounter with another Murray, a newlywed younger than I.


We were traveling by train from Florence to Venice. We were not aware that only the first two cars of the train would be uncoupled for the journey onto the island city. When the conductor eventually made this known to us in the fourth car, we hurriedly assembled our overpacked luggage and jostled our way forward.


I kept hearing my name; Gilda kept denying she was calling me. We finally made it to the second car, Gilda standing next to me. “Murray, wait for me” rang in both our ears. The dulcimer sound came from an attractive blonde. Sure, I’ll wait for you, I thought. Only, she wasn’t talking to me. She was attaching herself to a young gent standing next to me.


Naturally, we introduced ourselves. (Murrays have a certain bond, like Masons or Elks who meet in strange lands. No secret handshake, just a bond.) They were on their honeymoon, having married right after graduating from Queens College. His aunt, a travel agent, had gifted them a six-week honeymoon. They were booked into Excelsior hotels throughout Europe. Everything had been pre-planned and pre-paid. All they had to do was show up at their hotels and their respective city tours. They even had the time of their gondola ride scheduled—8 pm that evening.


It was already four weeks into their extensive tour. They were clearly exhausted but couldn’t take the time to rest. Pre-paid hotel reservations could not be changed, so they trekked on.


I asked how they liked Rome. They did. I asked what they thought of the Vatican. They sheepishly said they hadn’t seen it. Huh? Explain yourselves, Murray.


Seems his aunt did not book that tour. Before they realized the Vatican was in Rome they were in Florence. And they couldn’t go back!


My confidence that the exalted name of Murray was bestowed only on the intelligent vanished that instant.


Not all was lost, however. They realized they would not be able to use their passes to the Lido Beach across the channel before having to leave Venice, so they generously gave them to us. That way, at least, the Lido would not go Murrayless. We enjoyed a beautiful day at the beach.

Wednesday, June 25, 2025

Bentonville: What's There Not to Like?

In less than a week I will be officially retired for 16 years after spending more than three decades covering the retail field, from restaurants to physical retail stores to online commerce. As befitting its size, no retailer has captured my attention more than Walmart. I began covering the world’s largest company of any industry before it recorded its first billion dollar sales year. By the time I retired in 2009, sales had topped $401 billion. Today, sales exceed $643 billion.


Bentonville was a backwater northwest Arkansas community when Sam Walton planted his retail empire there. He began with variety stores franchised from the Ben Franklin company. He became their largest franchisee. But in 1962 the variety store format came under assault. Kresge opened its first Kmart. Woolworth countered with Woolco. The first Target opened. Lots of smaller, regional discount stores, retailers with names like Jamesway, Zayre, Caldor, Fisher’s Big Wheel, Kuhn’s Big K, populated the landscape.


Ever a student of retailing, Sam Walton appealed to his bosses at Ben Franklin to open a discount store format. They refused, so he opted to do it himself. The rest, as they say, is history.


This historical reverie was prompted by a New York Times article profiling Walmart’s new home office complex and its merchandising strategy to appeal to more shoppers and, equally important, its human resources strategy to attract the tech savvy workers needed to sustain its position and propel its growth  (https://www.nytimes.com/2025/06/21/business/walmart-rebrand-headquarters.html?smid=url-share).


Walmart can boast 90% of Americans live within 10 miles of one of its stores. I do not, though I do shop there when visiting family in Omaha and Tucson and when on vacation to stock up on essentials. (Full disclosure: Walmart did have a store in downtown White Plains that I frequented until it closed seven years ago.) The stores are nicer than they appeared decades ago, but still lack the look of a Target, both in visual and merchandising appeal. 


Because many Walmarts have an extensive food section, average sales per store of more than $122 million are roughly double those of Target. 


Retailing today is a complex mixture of logistics and merchandising fine tuned by savvy techno-experts. Recruiting talent ranks high on Walmart’s sustainability challenges list. 


The new headquarters in Bentonville has some of the same trademarks and perks found in Silicon Valley corporate offices. The company also has technology hubs in California and the New York metro. Still, to get recruits to move to Bentonville, Walmart must overcome a major employment differentiator. 


The natural beauty of Arkansas aside, in a more polarized America, Arkansas has become a state many highly educated workers would not move to. As Peter from California noted in a comment on The Times article, Arkansas:


“1.) ranks 44th for high school graduation rates;

2.) ranks at or near the bottom nationwide for healthcare outcomes, infrastructure and essential public services;

3.) has (this is documented) one of the most homogenous and virulently conservative populations in the country, one that  actively ridicules and suppresses centrist and liberal people and ideas;

4.) wrote laws specifically to FACILITATE discrimination against LGBTQ people, and prohibit local governments from protecting them;

5.) where nearly 60% of the population owns a gun, and has more guns per capita than 42 of the 50 states. No background checks, no gun owner licensing, no waiting periods and all the assault weapons you want to buy.”


The last time I visited Bentonville was in 2016 on a trip with Gilda to see Crystal Bridges, the American folk art museum built by Sam’s daughter Alice. The museum lived up to its glorious reviews. 


Bentonville had grown since my visits decades earlier. Population had soared above 40,000, about a tenfold uptick. Bentonville very much has been a corporate town. 


I wonder if Sam Walton ever envisaged his company would ever have, or need, such a corporate edifice? If Bentonville would ever have restaurants that rival those of any big city (and they do because representatives from major suppliers do not like to eat their dinners in a Waffle House)? I wonder if Sam would be comfortable believing his company retains values that were important to him—having the right merchandise at the right price at the right time? 


Sam also was a stickler for keeping payroll costs at a minimum. Given the environment in Arkansas, what will it take to lure the right and sufficient number of recruits to Bentonville?